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Sunday, March 9th, 2008
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5:04 pm - More to come.
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I feel like writing something later. We shall see..
PS: Went riding today. I am getting good at it (or so I think) :) Cantering is fun...
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| Wednesday, February 20th, 2008
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8:49 am - donuts = happiness
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My new office has big floor to ceiling windows. I just saw a guy on the street stop to give one of his donuts from his box of a dozen from Safeway to a homeless man on the curb. That stuff makes me happy. :)
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| Tuesday, January 22nd, 2008
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9:10 am - Unsettled
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I still think about my road trip a lot (if you don't know, I went 3000 miles with my mom for almost 3 weeks to Yellowstone, Rushmore, Mesa Verde, Grand Canyon, Salt Lake City, Idaho, etc last September). Just that freedom, neither of us had jobs to come back to... we just drove, and saw what we wanted to see. No stress. Maybe a few stressful moments, but overall, amazing :) Granted we were both so ready to come home at the end, but I look back and think about how foolish that was.
I am so restless, and I miss that. what's wrong with me? I have a great job, great friends, an apartment, a lovely kitty, a gym membership. I'm settled. But at the same time I find myself just wanting to pack a few things and leave. Sometimes when I am driving, I catch myself thinking, "what if I dont' take this exit and I just keep going?" Sometimes a song comes on my iPod that I listened to a lot on the trip. Sometimes I just look at the pictures, all several hundred of them, and daydream.
I can't. I have no money, and I have commitments. I can't leave. But god, I hate the stability of my life!
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| Thursday, January 17th, 2008
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9:14 am - a short lil' update
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So yeah, life is just going... the conference was fun this weekend, saw a lot of people I knew and hadn't seen in awhile. Learned some stuff. Mingled.
I got my raise and health care this week. If I didn't say that already. So that's exciting... well I gotta pick out a health care, I applied for one and I am waiting to get all the paperwork.. so there's that. I still probably won't work that many Fridays, which I think is nice because then I can enjoy life more and I make enough per hour to survive! :)
I still have that itch to do something else. Like just... leave. Ahhh. The road trip changed me. I'll write about that later.
I am going to the Decemberists on the 23rd, that'll be cool....
What else is new? uhh... hmm. I've been working out a lot and eating less (except Monday, the roomies birthday, was a food disaster day, cake, bread, etc... I woke up with what I call a bad food hangover, where you just feel disgusting!). I'm pretty healthy, I would just love to be the size I used to be (which even then I thought was "fat", it's funny how that works!). My weight gain this year has been unexplained, and I can't fight my biology, but all I can do is just be the healthiest person I can be. I think I'm fully vegetarian now after a year and a half of only eating poultry.. I think I'm done with all flesh at this point. I get enough protein from other things. I try to do about 35-45 minutes of cardio 5 days a week, just depends on my schedule and plans, but so far that's what goes down. I need to do my weights more still though, as of now it's been like once a week, and then yoga once a week if I can fit it in.
Anyway, diet and exercise is a boring topic to anyone but the person writing it, so I'll stop there.
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| Friday, January 11th, 2008
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10:44 am - Life as it goes.
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I don't even know if the subject to this makes sense.
Anyways.
What's new? Well, for starters, I am going to be a lot busier- I met with this guy who is running for office in my home district (51, Clackamas) and he has a great campaign going already. It's really energizing and exciting and I need to get back into politics. I will be working on his campaign, I just havent decided what yet. He asked if I wanted to "do something I was already good at, or develop new skills." That is SUCH a hard question! I mean, really!
This weekend, I am going to the Rebooting Democracy conference and I'm stoked. Some good friends are going and you always meet so many new people as well. I am interested in the "Bordering on Ridiculous" seminar about immigration measures on this fall's ballot, because as you know I work in immigration law. I am getting sort of excited about Obama actually, I think he's my fave since my man Bill Richardson dropped out the other day.
I have been feeling more "grown up" lately. More like an adult. I guess I am just noticing the transition. It reminds me of about a year ago, when my mom and I were talking on the stairway and she was asking me about this guy I was dating and hanging out with a lot. And she paused and finally said, "it's so cute to watch you grow up!" hahaha. But I am an adult, I am no longer a college student (tear) and I can do things like go to lunch or happy hour with lawyers and not feel out of place, or uncomfortable. I can hold my own, and I don't know, I guess this is just the vibe for 2008... it feels okay.
I finally have made some progress in the friend department with someone I kind of had a rift with. This also feels good and I just feel really positive this week. Work is going well, people are back in my life that weren't there a few weeks ago, new people are coming into my life, etc. I just feel... better. Energized.
I've been going to the gym a lot, and even keeping a food diary which really sucks but it helps me mentally keep track and be accountable. Even though I pretty much eat the same stuff every day (my bomb salad with spinach, feta cheese, garlic viniagrette, cranberries, and walnuts..mmmmm.. and very nutritious!). I started doing the stairs for my last 10 min of cardio at the gym so that it really kicks my ass. No matter how much you do the elliptical or run, that's horizontal, and you gotta do some vertical work too.
I think the stairs will help me get in better shape for hiking and what not- I gotta do this huge hike with Allison that we promised (we PINKY SWORE) that we would do some other time when we crapped out last summer (she had flu like symptoms, I hadn't eaten much that day, and the hike was waaaay longer than we thought). The hike is Saddle Mountain by the beach off Hwy 26. I think it's only like 6 miles but it's quite the climb. It started getting a little treacherous and not what we expected (more of a scramble than a hike at times). Which is fine, but we just didn't wanna do it at the time :)
Well, I have another hour or so by myself at the office until the boss and coworker get back. I am leaving early today to go to the conference so I should get some work done before then. Our office is moving to a condo by PSU/Safeway and so I gotta facilitate that!
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| Tuesday, January 8th, 2008
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1:48 pm - this is what I suck at
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I am working on my new years resolution of meeting strangers. Actually, I have no problem meeting strangers, unless they are cute dudes. hahahah. On New Years I met this girl in line at the bathroom at Bar XV and she was somehow convinced we needed to hang out (we were both drunk) and she had me call her cell to leave my number.. we were both Poli Sci majors at UO, but I don't know her. This is the story of my life. I drunkingly left her a voicemail while she was in the bathroom, and not surprisingly she hasnt' called me back (even if she did, uh, weird...right?) lol.
So I really wanted to talk to this guy on the bus. Cute, tall, glasses, reading a Hemingway book. I nicknamed him "Hemingway Hottie." But I have nothing to really spark up a convo about, plus we both have head phones on and he's several rows ahead of me. So I just watch him trying to balance while he's standing and reading his book, how cute... I promised myself that I had to talk to him before I got off the bus, but the best I can do is when I am getting off the bus I make eye contact with him and think to myself, "come on, Lin, SMILE!" I dunno I just can't do it, I feel creepy.. so I do the best I can which is to halfway smile, not showing any teeth. Which sucks, because I know I have a great smile when I do it. But I feel weird BEAMING at someone with a giant smile for no reason. So there's the story of my life. I am never going to meet anyone if I keep protecting myself, am I?
Until next time....
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| Monday, January 7th, 2008
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6:56 pm - Back in the game
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I got nominated to go to this:
http://www.rebootingdemocracy.com/index.html
I need to get back in the mix. Get more involved. I know some people there and I need to keep networking and keep up my political connections. Hella cool people and lots of people to meet too... and there's a cool thing Sat nite... it even has a DJ. hahahah. Nah, the Bus Project really does put on good events usually :)
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| Sunday, January 6th, 2008
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5:50 pm - I forgot to talk about new years!
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New Years was fun. Melanie, Natalie, Emelia, Allison, and Natalie's friend Sarah came over. Then my roomie came over with Desiree and a couple Russian dudes. One was snorting coke in the bathroom, I KNOW it... (he kept going in there... sniff sniff.... come out... go outside... blow his nose a lot... repeat). I had like 6 too many glasses of wine. Got a lil' goofy. Then we took the bus downtown.
It was freeeeeeezing. On the bus, this scary man kept calling to me. "BRRRRRRUNNETTE!" he'd say, in a Russian accent, rolling his R's. I was just laughing and trying to hide behind my friend which doesn't really work on the bus. I sent a lot of drunk texts including one to my ex boyfriend that said "OMG HELP". ?? I am such a lowlife! So this scary Russian guy kept saying "BRRRRRRUNNETTE!" and I don't know what exactly transpired, or WHY he was so intent on bothering ONLY me.... to be honest, but I then remember him talking about cutting off fingers. Three fingers will be cut off. He grabbed his hand and gestured. I laughed, "MY fingers or YOUR fingers?!" and he said his fingers. So I said, "oh, okay, that's fine." Then he said my hair looks like a fungus. Whaaaaat? I just dyed it, it's gorgeous.
I guess when he got off the bus Sarah noticed he had a hatchet... Who ARE these bus people?? Jeez.
Then we went to Bar XV, danced, midnight occurred about 10 minutes after we got in. First year in a loooooooong time without a midnight kiss. Luckily I had my girls to kiss me on the cheek. Then I got sort of over being drunk and more being sick feeling, so I tried to get us a cab to no avail. Luckily Nat's mom picked us up and drove us back to my apartment, then I went back and got the other 3 girls. Probably should not have driven. I wasn't drunk anymore, but, you know. Meh. Massive headache the next day. Wine'll do that.
Breakfast the next morning. Nothing like discussing the evening's events over French toast. The people at the table next to us were so happy to hear us talking about books and were really nice, when they heard me discussing Kite Runner. Which is really good by the way...
Anyway, gotta go back to scrapbooking from the road trip. Woooo!
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12:15 pm - Hmmmm
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I think I met my future husband. Well, sort of. I can't really say.... but yeah. I'm thinking a June wedding....
Kidding. But seriously. We shall see... the stars are aligning... sorry to be so vague. Or silly.
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| Monday, December 31st, 2007
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9:36 am - Blahhhh (with pictures!)
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So now not only is my great gramma still in the hospital from falling and breaking her hip, but the stress of it (or could it be the decades of smoking, drinking, gambling, and treating your family like shit?) caused my grampa to have a heart attack on Saturday night. So now they're both in the hospital and my poor dad is trying to take care of their house. Sorry, but my grampa is a complete asshole. No, not sorry, he is an asshole. A selfish person, who has treated my dad like shit and perpetuated the cycle of alcoholism and emotional abuse that I am striving to break.
Well, that's enough of that :) Tonight should be fun, so far I've got 5 of the girls lined up to come over, pre-funk here, then head downtown. I haven't been much of a "going out" person lately, however, my three best friends from highschool and I went to "Ground Kontrol" this video game bar, oh my god, I was really thinking it'd be stupid before we went but we wanted somewhere downtown and no smoking, and actually we had a lot of fun! We took a photo in the photobooth like in highschool, and played pinball... I have a short attention span though so I just kinda hung out after that.
Anyway, without further ado, here are some cool pictures of the last few weeks :)
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| Saturday, December 29th, 2007
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6:06 pm - Yeah, right...
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I stole this from my big's journal (HI NOODLES JONES!!) It looked fun and distracting. But I am not really "romantic" in fact I think that stuff is corny and I would rather not but anyway, apparently I am the sappy love girl. Ewwww.
The Sonnet Deliberate Gentle Love Dreamer (DGLD)  Romantic, hopeful, and composed. You are the Sonnet. Get it? Composed? Sonnets want Love and have high ideals about it. They're conscientious people, caring & careful. You yourself have deep convictions, and you devote a lot of thought to romance and what it should be. This will frighten away most potential mates, but that's okay, because you're very choosy with your affections anyway. You'd absolutely refuse to date someone dumber than you, for instance. Lovers who share your idealized perspective, or who are at least willing to totally throw themselves into a relationship, will be very, very happy with you. And you with them. You're already selfless and compassionate, and with the right partner, there's no doubt you can be sensual, even adventurously so. You probably have lots of female friends, and they have a special soft spot for you. Babies do, too, at the tippy-top of their baby skulls. Your exact female opposite: Genghis Khunt  Random Brutal Sex Master Always avoid: The 5-Night Stand (DBSM), The False Messiah (DBLM), The Hornivore (RBSM), The Last Man on Earth (RBSD) Consider: The Loverboy (RGLM) | | Link: The Online Dating Persona Test @ OkCupid - free online dating. |
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| Friday, December 28th, 2007
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8:46 am - The regulars
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So today I noticed that I have come up with stereo types and/or nicknames for the regular people who ride my bus every morning. "oh, there's the dork," I think to myself as this one kid gets on. He always has his hair gelled and combed back. He reminds me of the guy in "Grandma's Boy" (JP, the robot guy....). "are clothes expensive in the Matrix?" I want to ask this kid.
The there's the morbidly obese guy who at least several times a week drops his cell phone onto the floor of the bus and tries desperately to pick it up from between his legs on the floor, but he can't.... it's sad :(
The lady that ALWAYS bumps into everyone. I don't know how she manages. Yesterday she sat next to me and jabbed me multiple times. But even when she's not next to me she still slams into me walking by. She seems pretty normal too, so I don't get it.
Oh, and who could forget the girl who wears a skirt and no tights or anything despite the fact that it's snowing. You can tell she's trying really hard to look cute. Proudly displayed, one on each calf, is a tattoo of a swallow. Fucking cliche'. I want to say, "Really? REALLY? You got SWALLOWS?" lol.
Am I a bitch? I only do this in the morning, maybe I am cranky. hahah.
I love getting off the bus though and walking the last few blocks to work downtown, I pass Tiffany's and Sak's and I feel like the music on my iPod is my theme song. Today it was "Bittersweet Symphony" which is a great theme song to walk around downtown to :)
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| Thursday, December 27th, 2007
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6:22 pm - Mixed Nuts!
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So since we moved in here a month and a half ago I've been tapping into this wireless network called "Mixed Nuts." Must be a neighbor or something, but yay for an unsecured full bar wireless network.. now it's gone off my list and I can only get onto Metro-Fi with one bar :( If I am lucky.
Woe is me. I refuse to pay for the internet though so we'll see how this goes!
PS: I'm sick, every time I eat today my stomach hurts a LOT... all I ate just now was vegetables and I feel like I am going to die.
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| Wednesday, December 26th, 2007
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3:52 pm - Wednesday but it feels like Monday
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The long weekend was amazing... I didn't get back to my apartment until late last night, just in time to watch as much of "Planet Earth" as I could before I crashed. I was learning about mountains and bears, and then, boom. I was out.
In addition to the Planet Earth DVD set (it's so cool!) I got a tool set ("every girl needs a tool set," my mom said), some De Icer for the car, some apartment stuff, the perfume I wanted... etc.
My coworker is sick today, so it has been really quiet. Thankfully, my boss' neighbor who fixes our computers and is my age came in today to do some work on our network and what not. He's really nice, I've never met him though just emailing when we're trouble shooting. It was funny to actually meet him!
I made some new years resolutions for myself. Well, except I am starting them now. The first one is to talk to even more strangers than I already do. I'm not shy, but I just want to put myself out there more. Who cares if they think I am crazy? :)
The next one is to care even less about boys and only worry about myself, ie, stop making plans with boys that make it so I don't have time to go to the gym, for example. As fun as boys are, I need to make myself a priority and do what I want to do first. This will be a tough one. I don't just do this with boys, I do it with friends too. I need to learn when to say "no" and focus on giving myself time, and not be so rushed all the time trying to please everyone.
Another one is, I think I will be vegetarian. I already only eat chicken/turkey, and rarely at that. Why not give it up? Meh. We'll see. I could go off on nutrition and meat, probably not what you're thinking... I'll save that for another post.
Next- call more, text less. That's simple. Old school!!
Let's see, what else... oh yeah. I protect myself too much when it comes to boys, so even if there is a chance with them and they give the signs that they like me, I shut off (even if I am interested) and give off hella friends vibes. Poor dudes, probably dont' know what the hell is going on. If I like someone, I will tell them, or at least show interest! For example, the goodbyes are the worst- if there was ever an opportunity to stand there and smile and wait to be kissed like the girls in the movies, I would be like "hey, see you later!" and jump out of the car or run inside. I missed the lesson on how to do all this when I was with my boyfriend of 5 years, so there you have it. I date like a 12 year old! haha
Speaking of Travis, we were texting today and he was going off about his new Coach wallet and Burburry polo. WTF. I was like "do dudes even care about that stuff?" and he's like "yeah girls really like it." I said "nah, I like the two days stubble and a wallet with holes in it look, much manlier" hahah It's true though, there's something way sexier about a guy who doesn't wax his chest or get his nails done. And doesn't have a nicer shirt than I do. He said "well what if there were two guys at the bar and the one had nicer quality stuff" and I said "then I'd go for the one that wasn't trying to show off." :)
OK, back to work... blahhhhh
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| Sunday, December 23rd, 2007
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11:38 pm - Dogs
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So in looking on Craigslist for a possible dog for my dad, I have noticed a trend.
People "don't have time to give him/her the attention he/she deserves" or they have "small children and not enough time." Or, maybe they are moving and the new place doesn't allow dogs. What the fuck? How can you just get rid of a dog? I can't imagine.
Don't people realize a puppy is a commitment? Hell, even a dog is a commitment obviously, but there are so many damned "11 month old" dogs on there- still annoying like a puppy and demanding of attention, but past the super cute adoptable phase, and developing behavioral problems from the lack of training... oh, fucking irresponsible people.
I saw a lady on there with THREE different litters of kittens she was adopting out. I sent a nice little email saying "Jesus Christ, please spay and neuter your cats, it's not that expensive and thousands are put to sleep daily."
Sorry I keep bitching about things today. hahahha. I swear I have a soul.
On the animal note, it's always fun to watch Leo (my cat) and Jemma (my family dog that lives with my mom) interact- I brought Leo over for Christmas and they just mess with each other and get in these little fights. It's adorable.
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6:20 pm - Keira Knightley
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I'm sorry, but no actress or actor or anyone has bugged me like this woman. Girl's got a mad underbite, and can't shut her mouth, and it affects her speech and I can't understand what's she's saying because of her gross British teeth. I just watched Love Actually. Even when she is getting MARRIED she still has her mouth gaping open because there's too many damn teeth in it and her jaw is just jutting out!
It doesn't matter if she's pretty, or a good actress or not, it doesn't matter because I am too distracted by her fucking mouth.
I CANNOT BE THE ONLY PERSON WHO FEELS THIS WAY! haha. She'd be pretty if she had headgear or something to fix her face.
DEAR KEIRA: CLOSE YOUR MOUTH. Thanks.
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6:07 pm - واحدية
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احبه ممكن لكني ما عرف انا مكسورة
current mood:  listless
current music: Love Actually
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12:11 am - Weekend Update?
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Well hello. I am so tired this weekend! I had a couple girlfriends over, and we had some wine and wore tacky Christmas sweaters. It was fun. But I am just exhausted!
Last night I went to a funny version of "A Christmas Carol" put on by a comedy club in Beaverton. It was pretty good, but I was trying so hard to stay awake- I am usually worthless by Friday because I don't get any sleep during the week! Somehow I stayed up til 2 because Erin came home and brought Tanya over and we smoked and hung out til I finally forced myself to go to bed.
My boss spoiled us on Friday- we went to Mother's for lunch, then he took us to Borders and made us pick out TWO books each (I got Kite Runner and the newer book by that author, One Thousand Splendid Suns- I heard they're good, normally I choose non-fiction books but oh well!). THEN he took us to get flowers! This is in addition to the nice coffee maker he got me (from Starbucks, it was really expensive...) It's just weird, I am not used to even my family spending this much!
I had a productive morning, I went to Firestone and got an alignment and my belts fixed (just needed to be tightened! wooo). They tried to tell me new tires, uh, I have nice tires and they're not that old! Then I went to the gym and did some laundry at my mom's. Came home, took a nap, then the girls came over.
Tomorrow, I think I'm hanging out with my roomie from Freshman year in Ondine, Meg... and I am crossing my fingers that Allison (my best friend since 3rd grade) will call me, she's flying back from Australia tomorrow and we haven't seen each other since the end of AUGUST :( We've kept in good communication except I really started to miss her in the last few weeks since she's been done with her internship and thus traveling Australia and Fiji and without access to phone/email. I understand though if she just wants to crash and be with her family! If so, I'll just go over to my mom's which has been my Sunday routine as of late.
Monday, Christmas-Eve-Day, I hope won't be rough... For 6 years in a row, Trav and I would go to NW 23rd and eat at Pizzacato.. this year I am all alone :( Last year I wasn't entirely alone because Allison went with me for my tradition, but this year I don't see it happening. People are busy and I will be going with my dad and brother to see my great gramma, she fell and broke her hip and is in a home or something, and then we're going to see a movie.
New Years! Everyone is asking me what I'm doing for new years. All I know is that I hope I can get a group of us together. It's just that I have several groups and combining them is awkward and never works too well. I think at the very least Allison, Emelia, Natalie, Victoria, Rachel, maybe Katie and Melanie, and whoever else is in town can all get together and we can hit up downtown (though I'm not too keen on a $25 cover). But Desiree wants to hangout too, and then my friend Brandon invited me over (but I doubt I'll do that, hahahhaha).
OK, that's quite enough. I am sad, the people in the movie (Love Actually) fell in love and kissed, fucking happy Christmas love people, you suck!!!
So goes the saga of my life. Is this interesting to ANYONE? I can't imagine someone reading this and finding it remotely entertaining, but if so, hello there and merry christmas :)
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| Wednesday, December 19th, 2007
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12:16 pm - Some thoughts from my lunch hour...
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Work seems slow today, I know there's a lot to do but I'm not sure what he wants me to do... so yeah. I get so bored, does anyone have suggestions of fun websites to check? haha. I already do Perezhilton.com. Duh.
My lunch sucks. Reheated (soft, ew) tofu with stir fry veggies and teriyaki that I wipped up a few days ago. Washed down with some baby carrots and a smashed banana. Special treat for later: gingerbread cookie from Christmas Fantasy Trail Farm that I took my mom and brother to last night. Woooo. I gotta get out of the office but it's pouring down rain and I really have nowhere to go, it's not like I can go shopping. I have no money. But it's always fun to peruse the shelves at Borders, maybe I'll go to do that...
Tonight is happy hour with the girls. Usually it's Thursday, but we're doing it Wednesday because I think Leslie has something going on tomorrow. We keep trying to go to the Gilt Club but it's always booked out. Here's to hoping it's open today! I told them I couldn't go because of money, but they insisted... I feel bad.
Alright, I am going to go play in the rain and look at books or something!
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| Tuesday, December 18th, 2007
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1:02 pm - I'm scared
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I know no one reads this, at least anymore, but I just need a place to vent really quickly....
Money scares me. I don't know HOW people do it on their own. I did the whole college thing, with pretty hefty honors and a double major and lots of extracurriculars and leadership positions and internships and co-authoring journal articles... what did I do wrong? I work as hard as I can.
I buy my own car- yes that means the car, the gas, and the insurance. And the oil changes, and the belt-ease, and the deductibles. I pay my own rent and always have. My dad helped me with tuition in college, but I still have $13,000 in student loans that I wasn't really that informed about until now. (Mom always said dad would probably pay them off, but he's not...). I buy all my own stuff. I feel weird getting help from my parents and I won't do it. Actually, they can't help me anyway, they're both pretty broke these days.
But at the same time, I don't know ANYONE who does quite what I do, all on their own. I don't even have healthcare and I have a lot of things I need to go to the doctor about (one is pretty urgent too and scaring me).
Am I "poor" because I am trying to keep up with rich friends? Is it all about perspective? I feel like I am sinking. I use my credit card so much. Is that what people do? I don't know how I can survive without it. I told my mom "my only hope is to get married to someone rich" and she said "hopefully you'll get married soon enough." It's like they (my parents) think that that's what THEY did (college, marriage, blah) and that I should follow that exact path.
OK, I gotta get back to work. So I can attempt to pay my bills. Let's try to smile.
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